Archives for July 2016

Can I stay “conscious” when I’m sad and angry?

Will I stay in this place and fully feel these feelings?

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In my conditioned mind, I find fear that says staying with these feelings will destroy me. It also says that staying in anger will make me a darker, cynical person. Trying to rush out of this emotion causes a desire to create my story around this event and then spew it all over anyone that will listen, lowering the vibration of all involved.

Even though I can feel and know with my heart this is unhealthy, my conditioned mind wants to do that.
It thinks it will feel better if everyone knows how offended I feel. It wants everyone’s pity and wants to feel like the victim. I recognize this voice and I’ve been down this road before.

In the past, it hasn’t helped or made me feel better.

It’s time to try something different.

My conditioned mind has limiting beliefs and this time; I’m not going to believe it.

Instead I believe the opposite is true for me – If I STAY with these feelings, acknowledge them and feel them fully it will make me a lighter, happier person. Yes, I’m sad. I’m angry.

Can I still love myself even when I’m feeling these feelings?

Yes!

I will remind myself of this over and over if I need to.

I will treat myself kindly, feed myself nutritious food, give myself plenty of rest, get a massage and do whatever else I can think of to love and support myself. This too shall pass. I’ll remind myself that those who do or say hurtful things are doing them out of their own self hatred. It really doesn’t have anything to do with me.

If I believe it does and I allow myself to be offended, it will perpetuate the situation (I then start hating myself and in turn treat myself or someone else poorly). It becomes a destructive cycle. I’m staying here in this place of pain but I’m choosing not to suffer. I want to live in the present moment and not be lost in my conditioned mind.

If I hold my breath, I’ll never learn to breathe.

…and so life begins again…

This blog is a place for me to share my “Musings” – my thoughts, insights, reflections, challenges, victories and just a place for my voice to be heard. I chose “Untamed Woman” since it reflects a woman that is, according to its synonyms: wild, undomesticated, natural, feral and in their natural habitat. For me, this refers to my choice of not going with the “normal” or “tamed” flow of society, finding my own inner truth, being a free spirit and always questioning my own beliefs and motives. I’m not here to give advice, judge or to tell you I’ve found the truth. I’m here to be honest, vulnerable and open, sharing my life, connecting with you on a deep level.

I hope you can gain inspiration or amusement from what you read here. After living for almost a half century I’ve found the more I learn the less I seem to know. I’m learning to love myself – even those dark, shadow- y places within. I’ve been blessed with amazing teachers, healers and experiences to share. Life is messy and is painful at times – but we don’t have to suffer. “We do only three things in life: we sit, we stand, we lie horizontal. The rest is just a story”. – Byron Katie. I’m a Holistic Healer and it makes me very happy to help others feel their best. I’m currently working on an Associates Degree in Clinical Hypnotherapy.

Welcome to my blog.